If You Really Knew Me.....

So, a couple of things have spawned this post recently. First, a conversation I had with my brother and sister-in-law last weekend. We were discussing a few things, such as blogs, facebook posts, and those awesome "Christmas Letters" people send out at the end of the year. It feels as though some people write things that are just so ewy gooey my life is so wonderful and perfect in everyway, that you wonder what the real intention is. Is it to brag, boast, or make themselves feel superior? While I don't feel as though everyone has to air their dirty laundry, I do feel it is important to be real. I've expressed this before, I believe it was my very first post.
Second, there was recently a talk in the LDS conference address that caused a lot of discussion. So, I feel the desire to express some of my thoughts and feelings. There is a show on TV where a group of people go to Highschools and try to break down the cliques, and they play a game called "If you really knew me..." So, here goes.

If you really knew me, you would know that I have been through A LOT in my marriage. I'm married to a recovering addict, and the first few years of my marriage were some of the darkest, scariest times of my life.

If you really knew me, you would know that I would not have made it through those years without my family, friends, and most of all, my Heavenly Father, who literally had to pick me up and get me out the door some days.

If you really knew me, you would know that there are many things I DON'T care about. I don't care what color your skin is. I don't care what religion you are. I don't care if you love men or women. I don't care where you came from, what your family is like, or if you have "a past". If you are willing to open your heart to me, mine is open to yours.

If you really knew me, you would know that I am devoted to my faith. It has been a foundation that, without it, I honestly don't know if I would be here today. I believe in God, the Eternal Father, and in his Son, Jesus Christ, and in the Holy Ghost. Nothing will EVER shake this belief.

If you really knew me, you would know that deep down I'm a very insecure person. Some people have slipped out of my life without so much as an explantion, and it makes you wonder about yourself. I am, however, working on these insecurities, and hope to become a confident, positive person for myself and for the baby that will soon be a part of my life.

If you really knew me, you would know that I LOVE my family and close friends. I would go to bat for each and every one of them, everytime, regardless of what they've done. I'm very protective of these special people in my life, so don't mess with them!!!

These are just a few of my thoughts, I don't want to make this a mile long post, but these a some of the most important things about me. I hope that I never post or express anything that would make someone feel lesser than. If I do, don't hesitate to let me know. In the words of one of my favorite hymns, "Who am I to judge another, when I walk imperfectly? In the quiet heart is hidden sorrow that the eye can't see. Who am I to judge another? Lord, I would follow thee."