Dear Ella, February 19th, 2013

Dear Ella,

Well, this is the first chance I've gotten to sit down at the computer since Valentines Day, but I didn't want to miss the opportunity to tell you some of the reasons why I ADORE you.
When I look at you, I feel joy.  Genuine, pure, joy.  I love the shape your face takes when you smile.  Doesn't matter if it's a laughing smile, or a forced smile, or a playful smile.  It makes your eyes light up and does something to me that I can't explain.  I love your kind spirit.  You really know how to make your Mommy and Daddy feel so loved.  As much as I will complain about when you wake up in the middle of the night, there is something really special about these times too.  It's the only time that you really, really hold on to me.  I'll come in and lift you out of your crib and sit down in our rocking chair.  You usually are grasping onto your blankie with one arm, and the other one wraps tightly around my neck.  You pull my face down into yours and let out a little sigh, like that's the best thing in the world, to be so close to me.  I. Love. It.  Even when I'm so tired I can't see straight, I love this moment.  I love watching you and your Daddy together.  You guys have such an amazing, special relationship!  When you hear the garage door open at the end of the day, you say "Garage door......DADDY!!!" You spend the next two hours chasing him around and wrapping him around your pinkie finger.  I love this interaction.  I love your intelligence.  You are SO DANG SMART!! I may be biased, but I think you are the smartest little girl on the planet.  You will tell me words and sentences that I don't recall teaching you.  It really makes me realize that you are so aware of your surroundings, and makes me want to be sure to surround you with good, positive things, because you are soaking it all in like a little sponge.  I love that you love to have your tummy and legs tickled in the morning when I change you out of your jammies.  Sometimes you will let your mouth fall open and your eyes will kinda roll into the back of your head because it feels so darn good!  This makes me laugh out loud, you are so funny!  I love your confidence.  I PRAY that this stays with you as you grow older.  Right now, when your Mommy and Daddy tell you how special you are, you believe us.  I hope you always will and that you will grow to KNOW within yourself that you are special and amazing.  I love when you sing.  You love to twirl around and sing "Twinkle Twinkle Little Star".  You know every single word, and you DO NOT like to get help from your Mommy or Daddy when you are singing!  I love you spirit!  It bursts out of you in this beautiful light and it makes me feel so blessed to just be around you, and be your Mommy.  You are my special little girl, my beautiful Valentine, and I love you!

Mommy

Dear Ella, February 13, 2013

Dear Ella,

This past week has been MUCH better for you :)  You are all better and happy as can be!  Last Saturday, daddy took us on a family date to City Creek Mall.  We met his boss and his family there, and we had fun looking at the fish in the creek, then your favorite part, THE DISNEY STORE!  You love the Disney store because you're obsessed with Mickey and Minnie Mouse right now.  You got to color in front of the big screen, then Mommy and Daddy picked you out a special Mickey Mouse cup to drink your smoothies out of in the morning :)  The pictures above are of me and you before Daddy to us out.  After the Disney store we went to Kneaders for dinner.  You pretty much just ate your grapes (you call them beeps).  Today has been tons of fun so far.  This morning, cousin Zoe came and played for about an hour, then we went to story time at the Library.  This is the first time we've done that, and you LOVED it!  We will probably do that every Wednesday now.  Then Kes and Jay came over and you are all taking a rest now.
You are getting a lot better and saying your please and thank-you's.  I love how polite you are!  Although you are still hitting and kicking, and I just don't know what I'm gonna do about that.  I hope that you will grow out of it soon.  I've tried all sorts of discipline, and none of it's working :(
Your sleep got pretty messed up when you got croup, but you are getting back to your normal routine, which is good!!! Mommy needs her sleep!  I've also started taking you to Grandma Miller's for a few hours on Tuesday mornings, cuz Mommy decided she needed some "Mommy" time.  Not that I don't love being with you all the time, but I'm a much nicer Mommy if I get breaks every once in a while ;)  You like going, because cousins Jude and Molly are there on Tuesday mornings too.
Well baby,  as always I love you SOOOOO much!  There is a new song that we sing at night called "Songbird", and I especially love the lyrics towards the end of the song that say "And I wish you all the love in the world, but most of all, I wish it from myself".  I do hope that I can be the most loving mommy to you.  Sorry about the times when I lose my head and get grumpy with you :(  I'm working on it!!!!

Love you baby,

Mommy

Dear Ella 2.4.13

Dear Ella,

Oh baby baby baby, today was not a great day.  Let's start with yesterday (sunday).  You woke up with a cough and a slight fever, but you seemed ok.  Daddy stayed home from church with you, while I went.  I got a calling today (kind of an activities planner), which I was excited about.  When I got home you and Daddy were playing and you seemed great!  We had Grandma and Papa Miller over for the Superbowl game.  Around 5:00pm you started to get really grumpy.  But you went to bed great, so that was good!  Until 12:30am.....coughing so bad and so sad :(  I went in and rocked you until 2:30am.  Then you woke up again at 3:30am.  Then again at 4:00am.  At this point, I just got in your crib with you and snuggled you for the next three hours. (pays to be a small person sometimes!)  Zoe came over today and you guys seemed pretty good.  Zoe still has a cough too.  Well, Zoe went home and you went down for your nap at the regular time (12:40pm).  Unfortunately, you woke up at 1:25pm.  Very short nap.  You were having such a hard time breathing and you were sooooooo sad :(  It made mommy cry to see you so upset.  So I wrapped you up in some blankies and we went outside so you could breathe in some cold air.  Because at this point, I'm realizing you have croup, again.  You had it a couple of months ago too.  When you had it before, I took you to Dr. Doug and he gave you some steroids to take.  I gave you two doses that day and two doses again the next day.  It turned you into the Angry Incredible Hulk.  I swore I wouldn't give you steroids again.  Until I heard you not being able to breathe today.  So I had Papa Miller bring over the steroids (only gave you half a dose and am not gonna give you any in the day), and he and your Daddy gave you a Priesthood blessing.  This made Mommy feel A LOT better.  I love that your Daddy and Papa can help you in this way.  I know that you will feel a lot better tomorrow because of this.  I'm trying not to be too sad about you being sick, but it's hard because I love you so stinkin' much that it REALLY SUCKS seeing you hurt and feel crummy :(  But, I think, I know that tomorrow will be a better day.  You tried so hard to be happy today, even though you felt awful.  I really admire that.  You are Mommy's angel and I LOVE LOVE LOVE you!  Right now it's 8:30pm, you've been asleep for two hours and I haven't heard any coughing yet, so that's promising.  I have also rubbed every essential oil possible all over your chest, back and feet, and have it diffusing in your room.  I've got all my bases covered! Medical, holistic, and spiritual!  Can you tell I want you to feel better ASAP?
Well baby girl, here's to a better day tomorrow!  We'll have lots of fun :)

Love,

Mommy

Dear Ella 2/2/2013

Dear Ella,

I gotta say, looking at the picture above, you've got THE cutest smile in the whole entire universe!  Even covered in cookies it is beautiful :)  Today you went to your Uncle Ben's house and took a nap and played with Jay Jay while mommy and your Aunt Shelisa and cousin Keslee went to a baby shower.  Uncle Ben said you didn't nap very long, but that doesn't surprise me.  It's been a long time since you've had to nap away from home!  But you are still holding strong to the 13 hours at night, and I REALLY appreciate that!  It's so nice to sleep in until after 7:30am, and me and your daddy can stay up later too, since we don't have to wake up with you at 5:45am anymore. Tomorrow is the Superbowl and we are going to have your Grandma and Grandpa Miller over.  I'm sure you are going to love that :)  You love when people come over to your house to visit.  Notice I said "your" house.  Because lets be honest, you rule this place.  Me and daddy try to pretend that we are in charge, but you put us in our place. You got mad today because I wouldn't get your playdough down, but you've been grounded from playdough until you stop HITTING.  You've been doing this nasty little habit for a couple of months now.  I guess it's better than biting, but I still don't like it.  You are such a nice girl, so I'm not sure why you hit. 
Right now, you are upstairs rocking with daddy reading books and getting ready for bedtime.  You love when your daddy puts you to bed.  You used to only let mommy do it, but now you actually prefer daddy.  Don't worry, it doesn't make me feel bad :)  I love how much you guys love each other!!  Well, hope you sleep great tonight baby!

Love,

Mommy